Go Big or Go Home (or to the E.R.)

I think I mentioned that I am on a money-saving kick.

Along with reusing everything  I possibly can, I'm also trying to eat food we already have as opposed to buying new.

So I spent some time digging around in my deep-freeze.  It was kind of like an archaeological excavation.  You could see my "buy cheap" phase, my "buy organic" phase, my "vegan" phase, my "the kids are wearing me down--let's eat a bunch of crap" phase.. All in nice, neat, layers.

And this weekend, my family (unbeknownst to them) is going to help me test exactly how long chicken breasts can be frozen and then thawed and grilled.  :o)

The tightwad gazette lady's got nothin' on me!

Random Ramblings

I have a million thoughts going through my head.  For those of you who are now just a tiny bit worried, this is different than a million voices going through my head.  I know.  I've got a doctor's note.  :o)

But none of these thoughts are substantial enough to warrant an entire blog post.  So here they are, because "we're better together":

1.  First and foremost:  It's 9:08pm.  Can I legitimately go to bed yet?  This thought hits my brain around 4 pm EVERY. DAY.  Along with thoughts of...Is that a headache?  I think I feel a headache coming on.  That's gotta be good for an 8pm bedtime at least...

2.  I made my own ground mustard today.  Yeah.  That sounds really amazing, but actually it isn't.  I was out of ground mustard, and I was too lazy frugal to go to the store for it.  So I pulverized mustard seeds in the coffee grinder.  Worked like a charm.  Except that the next person who grinds coffee beans is gonna get a little bit of a mustard bite along with their Sam's Choice Free-Trade Espresso Blend.  Sorry, Better Half!

3.  Speaking of frugal--I'm on a money-saving kick these days.  It means I'm doing things like shopping at Aldi (where I found avocados for $0.39 a piece and hormone-free milk--I LOVE you, Aldi), and washing out Zip-Lok bags and re-using tin foil. I do wash out Zip-Lok bags regularly, but I've taken this to a new level.  ANY bag with a zippered seal is getting washed to be reused.  So if you dig in my fridge, those may not be dried apricots.  That may not be shredded mozzarella cheese. Just giving you a heads-up.  And if I bring you some food item and the foil on the top is REALLY crinkly, I washed it first, I promise.  :o)

4.  I SUCK at CrossFit.  I know this because not only do I need a step-by-flippin'-step instruction guide--with pictures--for each and every weight-lift every time (even if I just did whatever we're doing two days ago),  I apparently don't understand what to do if I can't actually lift the thirty pound bar stupid thing and it falls--today it landed on my shins.  I have since been instructed that if the bar is falling forward, throw it forward...etc. Makes perfect sense.  But I'm pretty sure that if I have enough control of the stupid thing to know which direction it's going, I should be able to get it into whatever position it's supposed to be in in the first place.  Ugh.  I now know why running is my primary form of exercise.  One. Foot. In. Front. Of. The. Other.  That's all I'm good for. Truly.

5. Speaking of injured shins--last week, a couple of my seasoned CrossFit friends were showing off their bruises and telling me what I have to look forward to.  I think you jinxed me, ladies. By tomorrow, I'll have a matching set of doozies to show you!

6.  Handstand Pushups???  What drunk idiot even THOUGHT to do that?  Come on.  Really?  What self-respecting adult does a handstand against a wall and then says, "Dude, Biff.  Watch this!  Watch me put my forehead on this filthy floor, my disgusting feet on this wall, and then push myself up with my brute strength."   Okay.  Done thinking  about CrossFit.  Until Friday at 5:15am...

7.  While we're on athletics, my kids got the athlete gene.  The one that skipped me.  Oldest son and his baseball team won their baseball tournament after five games and triple-digit temperatures and baseball dugouts designed for Alaskan baseball players.  They trapped some serious heat!  Youngest son is turning into quite a pitcher, and the Mermaid shaved 12 seconds off of her IM (individual medley--read: crazy race) time at her last meet.

8.  This is the summer of laundry.  I wash towels.  And baseball uniforms.  And more towels.  And more baseball uniforms.

9.  Dear Friend's beautiful baby gets more yummy every single day.  Today she snuggled in and let me hold her while she napped for two hours.  Dear Friend and I drank coffee and chatted and stared at her baby. It was perfect! WHAT on EARTH did we do together before that fabulous baby arrived?

10.  It's hot.  I mean "Death Valley" kind of hot.  We have some friends who live a stone's throw from Death Valley.  They are visiting this week.  The week that it's only 4 degrees cooler here than it would be there and the humidity is 18% higher.  Sorry, friends.

And now, folks, it's 10:41.

I can legitimately go to bed without feeling like a loser.

Sweet dreams to you and yours!

Out of the Mouths

I'm so proud.

So far today I've heard:

Butthole

Frickin'

Shut Up (more times than I can count)

Stupid

Turd

And this is what's been said when I've been within earshot.  I don't even want to THINK about what's being said when I'm not.

I "heart" public middle school.

I've Got A Feeling

It started a couple of weeks ago.

I started wondering about some things.  Things like "What if we..."

For the record--those were not prayers.  Only musings.  I have learned that one should be VERY CAREFUL what one prays for.

For example, "Lord do whatever it takes to fill in the blank here..." is pretty dangerous prayer territory.  My finite human brain can't even fathom what license that might give the Almighty.

So again, God.  I wasn't praying.  Just wondering.  I think you misunderstood me.

And yet...

I've got this (I'll be completely honest, here--SINKING) feeling that we are at a bend in the road.  We've been cruising down this one for several years and it's been pretty smooth.  Paved...four lanes...65 mph...just a few road construction detours along the way.  The scenery's been pretty good, and we've made good time.

But now the road is turning.  I'm not at all sure what the next leg is going to look like.  It might be the most amazing part of the journey yet.  Or the most terrifying.  Or both.

I sincerely hope this is all just coincidental and to at all a direct result of my musings.

Because--

I. Was. Just. Wondering.

I. Was. Not. Praying.

Time will tell.  But either way, we'll be sure to send you a postcard.

Cross Fit Critique

I am not athletic.  In the least.

The athlete genes--which are decent in my family--completely skipped over me.

Math was my most dreaded subject in school all the way through college, but P.E. ran a neck-and-neck second.

I was always picked last for kickball (because I was either: 1--the biggest dork in my class, 2--the worst player in my class, or 3--both).  I could never climb that big rope all the way to the ceiling, do a chin-up, hit a baseball, manage an overhand volleyball serve, or do that weird backward thing over the high jump.  I remember the unit on weight lifting in eighth grade.  I couldn't even bench-press the bar.  And let's face it.  There's a pecking order in gym class and it sucks to be at the bottom.  Kids are mean.

Fast-forward to adulthood.  My love for cheesecake and copious amounts of guacamole and chips, combined with growing four human beings over the course of a decade, forced me to re-evaluate physical exercise.

But the scars are still there.  I prefer workouts to be solo.  I can put one foot in front of the other, so I do run some.  I will make a fool of myself in my basement in front of my TV, because although I can see Jillian Michaels, she can't see me.

I first heard about Cross Fit from my friend, Jamie, last September.  She started raving about this wonderful program she had found that focused on making you Strong.  Healthy.  Fit.

I was immediately interested.  See, I'm not strong.  I have a decent amount of endurance, but I'm not strong.  And I'd like to be.  My first question was, "Cool!  Can I do it at my house?"

Um. No.

Then Jamie started talking about the stuff they do.  She used words and phrases like "gym rings" and "Olympic lifts" and "as many as you can in one minute."  I started to have Presidential Physical Fitness Award flashbacks.  I may have even started shaking.  I wrote it off immediately.

Cross Fit:  Not. For. Me.

Six months later, somehow this same friend, plus eating a Paleo diet, plus a blog of a friend from high school who can now do a chin-up all by herself (and looks so good that except for the fashion choices and the two kids that are with her, I can't whether her Facebook photos are current or from 1991),  convinced me to try Cross Fit.  I dragged Better Half into this with me mostly because I figured since he's my husband he's obligated to take down anyone who makes fun of me, but also because this kind of thing is right up his alley (He is actually athletic).

Yesterday I went to my  first class.  Solo.  Better Half begged off using the tired, but ever effective "early work meeting" excuse.

And honestly?  A lot of it took me right back to junior high P.E., complete with the teacher who is a football coach?  Was a football coach?  Likes football?  (sorry...it was 5:15am, so my recollection of his credentials is a little bit fuzzy.) I didn't know what I was doing.  I had to do fewer, lighter, slower, or even "completely different" than everyone else.

But there was one huge difference:

There was no pecking order.

Everyone was so very nice and encouraging and helpful.

There are some really great things about being an adult, and one of them is that you can walk into a room where you still can't do a chin up without some rubber band thing that practically bungees you back up to the bar each time, and people don't make fun of you.  In fact, they tell you how great you did.

And even though I did fewer, lighter, slower, and "completely different" than everyone else, I'm still so sore today, that I can't get undressed without assistance.

And this fact alone, my friends, makes Better Half a HUGE fan of the start my Cross Fit adventure. :o)

So I guess I'll go back on Monday.

Summer Is for Reading

I love summer vacation for lots of reasons.  But the biggest reason is reduced-guilt reading.  I can't say "guilt free" and here's why:

It's 2:59 pm, Central (Daylight Savings) Time.  I've been awake since 6:30.  So far today I've

Finished a 512-page novel that I started last night at 5 pm.

Downloaded two new books to my e-reader.

Caught up on some blogs I regularly read (which precipitated one of the e-reader purchases--thanks, Jamie).

Texted my dear friend about "doing likewise" and reading the book with me.

Vowed to just read the Acknowledgments and Introduction of the new book and then "get busy getting something done" but wound up reading the first two chapters.

Checked Facebook.

Read some email.

Perused front page of The Wall Street Journal.

Calculated how much money I'm going to owe Small Son by the end of the summer at the rate he's reading (I offered to pay my children a dollar for every 100 pages they read--I am not above bribing my children to exercise their brains--or join me in my obsessions).

Here's what I haven't done:

Much of anything else.  Well, there was a minor incident involving keys and a car and a teen-aged daughter and a locksmith that took some time, but that's another post.

So...when Better Half gets home tonight, not-so-subtly looks around the house, and asks in that trying-to-sound-casual way, "So...what did you do today?"

I'm only gonna have myself to blame...

Author's Note--Small Son just walked in from hanging out at a friend's house with two borrowed books in his hands.
Me:  New reading material?
He: Yup.  Four dollars worth.