Mission Impossible

Your mission, should you chose to accept it:

Turn this

Into this.  Ish.

I have average intelligence.  Not only should I never have touched this one with a ten-foot pole, but I should have run from it, screaming, with all the life left in me.

But there's this little phenomenon called the Do It Yourself blog post, where perky people assure you that these kinds of transformations can occur in roughly a week--all while working around your busy toddler's erratic nap schedule.  

And I'm kind of a tight-wad.  Living in a place where I know very few people and trust even less of them.  And where I'm 2,000ish miles from Nelson Construction--the only people I would ever consider paying to accomplish this.

So in desperation, I Google searched.  And spent an hour on Pinterest.  After reading just a couple of these DIY entries plus a trip to Home Depot and the Benjamin Moore paint store, I was fully armed with the tools and  most importantly, the ego necessary to begin.  

That was four days ago.  

My kitchen now looks like this.

And there's still all of this that hasn't even been TOUCHED yet.

I swear those cabinet doors are having babies over in that corner.  Every.single.time. I walk by, there are more of them.

I am nowhere near finished.  At this rate, I'm shooting for a completion date around Eldest Bro's high school graduation reception.  June-ish of 2016.

So even though "Carpenter Casey" has a nice, albeit Sesame Street-y ring to it, I'm pretty certain it is not ever going to be a thing.  Ever.

And the Do It Yourself blog is very possibly the spawn of Satan.